The day after Christmas, I posted this on my FB wall:
Love the sunsets in north Texas.
I made it through the second Christmas without Andrew Raymond Duncan with lots of joy and peace and love from family and friends.
We are that much closer to the day we join him at the throne of our Savior.
Have a great weekend!
Clearly, at least one person misunderstood what I meant. She wrote:
I can not–will not– believe that Andrew Raymond Duncan (or anyone else) would want us to count down the days, weeks, years, and holidays until we join him.
Life and the people in our lives are too precious–live for and with those who are alive.
Cherish those who are around you, instead of focusing on those who are not.
Andrew was so full of life–I truly believe it would break his heart to see people treating their lives as a “waiting room” for death.
To clarify, I do not treat my life as a waiting room for death.
And I hope and pray that none of you treat your life as a waiting room for death. Live! Live well! Live with JOY and PEACE and HAPPINESS and GRACE and LOVE!
Reading through the Bible, I have learned that Heaven is a very real and very beautiful place. I do look forward to being there for all eternity. I look forward to seeing my Savior face-to-face and worshiping the Father without distractions. There are many people that I look forward to spending time with: Sarah, Abraham, Joshua, Ester, Rita & Glen Duncan, my dad and mom, Grandmother Estes and her forefathers, children of many of my While We’re Waiting friends and many, many more. I do look forward to hearing Andrew’s laugh and getting a hug from him.
But I am in no hurry to get there.
I have work to do here on earth still! God has prepared work for each of to do while on earth. I want to do the work He has prepared in advance for me to do. And I have lots of things I want to see and do. I want to learn to solo hang glide. I want to truly understand the book of Romans. I want to lose another 15 pounds and run a half marathon. I want to travel with Ron when we do not have to be any place. I want to read a few books and finish more Precept studies. I want to see what direction my young adult children choose. I want to see Israel. I want more grandchildren.
I enjoy my life. I enjoy the journey.
I have many friends who have lost children in the past year or two. Many of them are my “friends” on Facebook. I try to post encouragement to them, to encourage them that as time goes by, the pain gets less. In time, the deep sorrow dissipates. In time, laughter and joy and healing will come. Many of us count the time since we last saw our child alive: 7 weeks, 157 days, 16 months, 4 1/2 years. Rather than looking back to the time we last saw them, some of us try to look forward: I am 7 weeks closer to the reunion in Heaven, 157 days closer to seeing Jesus, 16 months further down the road to true healing, 4 1/2 years closer to seeing my son again.
It is a way to turn our sorrow into hope. Our pain into healing. Our grief into looking toward a future. A way to begin living again after a painful death.
Looking forward to something does not mean we don’t live for today. Wanting to see someone does not mean I care less for those around me. Heading towards a goal does not mean I do not enjoy the journey towards the finish line.
There is joy in this journey along with some pain and lots of challenges. But a joyful journey it is.