Batman

Most of the time I have peace and joy.  But…

At times … rarely these days … But at times, I feel a deep, aching sorrow over losing my son. A sadness flickers through my being. Usually lasting only a short time. Moments really. And I wonder if I am alone in missing him. 

Invariably when this happens one of my friends will mention him or post a photo without knowing the dark place I am in. These kindnesses help. They bring me great joy and often a little giggle as I recall his antics. 

It happened this week when three of his friends posed with serious faces dressed in Batman shirts. And Saturday night, they had an “Andrew Themed Panty Raid at Texas”. All in good fun, led by the real adults who make sure the girls are dressed prior to the guys running through the dressing room yelling cheesy pickup lines and tripping over things. 

If you have a friend who lost a child, find time in the next week or so to send a message, note, or photo to let them know their child is not forgotten. Those remembrances bring healing. And show you care. 

  
  

Andrew Raymond Duncan, Batman


KathleenBDuncan

I write about my life, my journey, my family, and my faith. I am wife to one, mom to seven with one in heaven, and grandmother to many. I am also full-time caregiver to my stepmom E who suffers from dementia due to Alzheimer’s. In my spare time I like to read, travel, crochet, bike, and play with our black pug Molly.

Comments (3)

  • I understand your feelings. My son has just been dead about three months. I still cry most days, but I also worry about him being forgotten. I’m working hard to process my grief, you’re lucky having his friends close. My son had lots of friends, but I don’t hear from them. I guess they veer away from me, when someone mentions his name I tear up. I’m hoping the pain lessens as the months go by.

    • Sandy,

      Andrew was part of the outdoor musical TEXAS. Many of his friends from that show friended me on FB. They now live all over the world. I enjoy seeing them moving on to new jobs, getting married, etc. And I’m glad they post memories of my son.

      A few weeks ago, I posted on his page asking for pictures. I got lots!

      I also reach out to them. Asking about their summer plans, commenting on graduation, wedding, shower posts. They know I care about them, not so they will talk about my kid, but because he loved them I will.

      It is still early for all of you. Three months is not long. They are probably still hurting and are not sure how to reach out. I hope they do.

      Blessings of peace to you today.

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