Our Seventh Thanksgiving

Our seventh Thanksgiving without Andrew. I miss him. I still have days when the grief takes my breath away. But those days are rare and far between. The missing is more of a dull ache than searing pain. His name is mentioned. His siblings remember. His friends remember. We remember. But even if no one…

Grateful for Grief

I wrote this to a friend earlier today. He was my son’s friend. He is now my friend. And he’s grieving the loss of yet another friend. I thought I’d share it with you. Are you grateful for the grief and trials in your life? If so, why? Please share in the comments.

Dancing

A few months after The Accident that took my twenty-year-old son’s life, I had a series of dreams. In the first one Andrew was dancing before the Throne. (He was a professional dancer when he died.) There was a bright spotlight on him. My view was a closeup of him dancing though I could tell…

Another Year Has Passed

Another year has passed. I realize I am not the first mother to lose her son. Eve grieved Abel. Mary grieved Jesus. I will not be the last. Many others will walk this road. But knowing these things does not make losing my Andrew easier. What has made this loss bearable is knowing my son…

Five Years

I’m in Denver for a few weeks with a loved one. She needs my help right now. She’s been ill and is in a rehab hospital. I’ve been here four of the last six weeks. I’ll be here for weeks at a time the next few months. I am here by myself. This is going…

Night Time. Dark Time.

Middle of the night. Night time. Dark time. Hardest of hard times in grief. So many dark thoughts. So many memories. So many unfulfilled dreams. So much pain. So much loneliness. Nighy time. Dark time. No one there to listen to my cries. No one there to sooth my hurts. No one there to hold…